Stories We've Heard, Stories We've Told by Kottler Jeffrey

Author:Kottler, Jeffrey
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Oxford University Press
Published: 2014-03-11T04:00:00+00:00

Novelty

People tend to remember those stories that are most unusual and challenge their expectations (Atran, 2002), pushing a kind of “save button” in the brain (Gallo, 2014). The more strange, unexpected, and surprising the story (within certain parameters and familiar structures), the more listeners or readers are stimulated and attentive, even in settings such as trying to change attitudes and policies with The World Bank (Denning, 2000).

The hunger for novel experiences is also one reason why there is such increased popularity (until saturation) of shows, books, and films about zombies, vampires, aliens, and mutants. We desperately want to believe that we control our own destiny, that we can overcome threats of Nature and happenstance, that we can truly understand what’s really going on most of the time—which, of course, is impossible, so we cling to stories of the supernatural, as well as those that open doors to worlds and experiences that are beyond our reach.

Mark Leeman worked in a homeless shelter, conducting intake interviews, which basically involved asking people to tell the story of how they came to be living on the street, having lost almost everything, including their dignity and self-respect. He observed a phenomenon that is well known to any of us who help for a living—that the most interesting stories belong to those who are suffering and dispossessed. They are especially intriguing to us because they describe experiences that are truly unusual or extraordinary. “The trouble lies in the fact that the people living out these unusual circumstances [of homelessness] are often also suffering in them. The disruption that makes their stories interesting to the rest of us also tends to make them vulnerable, exposed, and yes, even exploitable” (Leeman, 2011, p. 108).

We are taking something from clients when we invite them to share their stories. It is for this reason that Leeman believes that there must be an equitable exchange of stories between participants, a balance between the burdens and benefits. By this he means that the healing and help that we offer in return for their storied gifts we receive comes in the form of truly listening with compassion and total attention, respecting and honoring their pain. “At my worst moments,” he confesses, “I can condemn myself as a narrative charlatan: a secure, healthy, and wealthy scholar collecting stories at cut-rate prices for my personal and research gains” (p. 108).

The novelty of the therapeutic encounter is that stories are indeed exchanged between one another in such a manner that the participants mostly listen carefully to one another instead of constantly interrupting—or being interrupted by the beeping/ringing/signaling intrusions of modern-day life.

Download

Copyright Disclaimer:
This site does not store any files on its server. We only index and link to content provided by other sites. Please contact the content providers to delete copyright contents if any and email us, we'll remove relevant links or contents immediately.